{"id":31975,"date":"2022-09-10T15:51:22","date_gmt":"2022-09-10T20:51:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/7-things-to-remember-when-terminal-illness-affects-your-church\/"},"modified":"2022-09-10T15:51:22","modified_gmt":"2022-09-10T20:51:22","slug":"7-things-to-remember-when-terminal-illness-affects-your-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/7-things-to-remember-when-terminal-illness-affects-your-church\/","title":{"rendered":"7 Things to Remember When Terminal Illness Affects Your Church"},"content":{"rendered":"
Daan Stevens photo – Unsplash <\/p>\n

By Ken Braddy<\/em><\/p>\n

I remember it well. My wife and I were watching a movie at our local theater when she received a phone call from one of the pastors on our church staff about a family in our church.<\/p>\n

The phone call was about Jackie, and her husband Randall, who were founding members of our Bible study group several years prior. They were faithful attenders, supportive members of the church and our group, great parents to their daughter, Jayce, and they both loved Jesus.<\/p>\n

When my wife stepped out of the theater to take the phone call, the pastor\u2019s first words were, \u201cRandall just died.\u201d I remember how my wife came back into the theater, grabbed her purse, and whispered through tears, \u201cWe\u2019ve got to leave. Now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Randall\u2019s death was the end of his multi-year struggle with Lou Gehrig\u2019s disease.<\/p>\n

There are numerous crises that can affect a congregation. Divorce or abandonment is one. A sharp disagreement between two or more group members is another. A person or couple can have a grievance with church over a variety of issues.<\/p>\n

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But the crisis of a terminal illness and the death of a church member is one that tops this list\u2014a crisis that most groups are not prepared for, but will almost certainly encounter.<\/p>\n

Randall\u2019s death came suddenly and unexpectedly, even though we\u2019d known for years that his battle with Lou Gehrig \u2019s disease, if not healed miraculously by God, would end with his death.<\/p>\n

We watched this terminal illness slowly attack Randall\u2019s body. He once told me he used to lift weights, run, and prided himself on keeping his body in great shape. He had energy, stamina, and felt invincible. Now wheelchair bound, he couldn\u2019t perform the simplest of household duties. He and Jackie purchased a special recliner that made it easier for him to be lifted up so he could stand, and his mobility was aided by a new electric wheelchair.<\/p>\n

On several occasions our Bible study group spent Saturday mornings at their house, trimming bushes, adding mulch to flowerbeds, and doing general cleaning tasks. It was our joy to serve this wonderful family.<\/p>\n

When\u2014<\/em>not if\u2014<\/em>your congregation or small group finds itself with an opportunity to serve and minister to a person with a terminal illness (and their family), there are a few things to keep in mind.<\/p>\n

1. Your presence is a ministry<\/strong>.<\/h3>\n

Coach your church that it\u2019s OK if they don\u2019t feel like they have words of wisdom, peace, or comfort to deliver to the terminally ill individual.<\/p>\n

The story of Job reminds us how important and comforting our presence can be. Scripture says,<\/p>\n

Now when Job\u2019s three friends\u2014Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite\u2014heard about all this adversity that had happened to him, each of them came from his home. They met together to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they looked from a distance, they could barely recognize him. They wept aloud, and each man tore his robe and threw dust into the air and on his head. Then they sat on the ground with him seven days and nights,but no one spoke a word to him because they saw that his suffering was very intense.\u201d (Job 2:11-13, CSB).<\/em><\/p>\n

2. Don\u2019t tell the person, \u201cI understand<\/strong>.\u201d<\/h3>\n

Every person\u2019s experience is different, and even if you\u2019ve had a disease and are in remission, you won\u2019t be able to say \u201cI understand\u201d with absolute integrity.<\/p>\n

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3. Press into the person\u2019s life; don\u2019t pull away.<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Sometimes if we\u2019re uncomfortable with a person\u2019s illness, we\u2019ll tend to pull away and not minister to them. There is no reason to do that. This is the time in life they need you the most.<\/p>\n

4. Do say, \u201cI want to understand what you\u2019re going through<\/strong>.\u201d<\/h3>\n

This opens the door to a conversation that could reveal what the person is thinking, feeling, and experiencing. It puts you in the position of listener, not a guru who has all the answers.<\/p>\n

5. Don\u2019t forget to support the spouse<\/strong>.<\/h3>\n

It\u2019s easy to focus on the person who is sick, but don\u2019t forget about the spouse. That person will need just as much love and support as the terminally ill one.<\/p>\n

6. Do say, \u201cI care about you and I\u2019m sorry you\u2019re hurting<\/strong>.\u201d<\/h3>\n

Empathize with your friend and avoid saying \u201chelpful\u201d phrases like, \u201cIt\u2019s going to be alright.\u201d<\/p>\n

7. Allow your congregation or small group moments to pray and process what they\u2019re experiencing emotionally<\/strong>.<\/h3>\n

In times when the terminally ill person is not around, take some time and help people talk about their own sadness, anger, fear, or frustration with the condition of your terminally ill member. Remember that times like this brings their mortality closer than ever.<\/p>\n

Jackie asked me to preach Randall\u2019s funeral service, which I was glad to do. It was a special privilege to speak about this godly man whom God had called into ministry years ago. It was easy to speak about my friend\u2019s love for God, his heart for evangelism, his faithfulness as a church staff leader, his support as a church member and group member, and his love for his wife and daughter.<\/p>\n

Randall was the real deal. Salt of the earth. He\u2019d give you the shirt off his back. He was just that kind of guy. Today, Jackie and Jayce have moved forward and a level of healing has taken place.<\/p>\n

KEN BRADDY (@kenbraddy)<\/strong> manages the ongoing adult Bible study department at Lifeway and disciples a group of adults at his church in Shelbyville, Tennessee. He is the author of several books, including <\/em>Breathing Life Into Sunday School. He blogs regularly about Sunday school and groups at kenbraddy.com.<\/em><\/p>\n

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Dig Deeper at Lifeway.com<\/div>\n
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Suffering Is Never for Nothing<\/h2>\n

Elisabeth Elliot<\/p>\n

FIND OUT MORE <\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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Daan Stevens photo – Unsplash By Ken Braddy I remember it well. My wife and I were watching a movie at our local theater when she received a phone call from one of the pastors on our church staff about a family in our church. The phone call was about Jackie, and her husband Randall, … Continue reading “7 Things to Remember When Terminal Illness Affects Your Church”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31975","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sermons"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31975","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31975"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31975\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31975"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31975"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31975"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}