{"id":32326,"date":"2022-09-10T16:05:11","date_gmt":"2022-09-10T21:05:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/3-things-to-remember-when-people-leave-your-church\/"},"modified":"2022-09-10T16:05:11","modified_gmt":"2022-09-10T21:05:11","slug":"3-things-to-remember-when-people-leave-your-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/3-things-to-remember-when-people-leave-your-church\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Things to Remember When People Leave Your Church"},"content":{"rendered":"
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By Rob Hurtgen<\/em><\/p>\n

Few things are as emotionally draining, hurtful, and discouraging as when a church member tells you they\u2019re going to attend another fellowship.<\/p>\n

This is especially the case when it comes from people you\u2019ve poured your life into\u2014people you\u2019ve discipled, gone on mission trips with, and shared time and meals.<\/p>\n

Sometimes, these members have legitimate reasons to leave. Perhaps they\u2019re relocating because of a new job. Or maybe they\u2019re marrying someone who attends another church.<\/p>\n

Then there are the other reasons. Someone may come to you saying, \u201cI’m not being fed in our Sunday School anymore. My kids need different programs than this church offers. Pastor, it\u2019s not you; it\u2019s me, but my family and I are leaving.\u201d<\/p>\n

Whatever the reason, an emotional vacuum often forms when people leave. Whether you ignore that emotional wake or elevate it to a position where it doesn\u2019t belong, it can wreak havoc on your life.<\/p>\n

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But there are other ways to respond when someone leaves your church. Here are three ways to address disappointments, heartbreaks, and breakups in the pastorate.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t ignore the way you feel<\/strong><\/h3>\n

You\u2019re an emotional being. Having emotions is part of what it means to be created in the image of God. To ignore your feelings is to neglect a critical piece of your imago Dei.<\/p>\n

That feeling in the pit of your stomach when a family leaves your church is actually good. It tells you that family matters to you.<\/p>\n

They were a part of the flock entrusted to you, and you cared for them. You don\u2019t want to ignore the way you feel.<\/p>\n

In his book \u201cThe Happy Christian,\u201d David Murray offers six questions that help us think through whatever is causing stress and discouragement in our lives. He writes:<\/p>\n

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  1. What are the facts?<\/li>\n
  2. What are my thoughts about the facts?<\/li>\n
  3. What are my feelings?<\/li>\n
  4. Can I change the facts?<\/li>\n
  5. Can I change my thoughts about the facts?<\/li>\n
  6. What am I feeling now?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Working through these questions may not change what\u2019s happening in your life. It may change, however, how you think and feel about what\u2019s happening.<\/p>\n

    Don\u2019t follow your heart<\/strong><\/h3>\n

    The worst advice anyone can give or receive is probably to follow one\u2019s heart. Jeremiah 17:9 says, \u201cThe heart is more deceitful than anything else, and incurable\u2014who can understand it?\u201d<\/p>\n

    Leading with your heart is the worst possible way you can lead.<\/p>\n

    Don\u2019t misunderstand me; heart-filled compassion is necessary. Passion is a priority, but following your ever-changing heart is like chasing the wind.<\/p>\n

    Resist the urge to let your heart set the course of your days and your response to others.<\/p>\n

    One of the transferable lessons we learn from the world of sports is the importance of drills. Drills are repetitious exercise needed to master a skill.<\/p>\n

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    See also  How to Pass the Baton to the Next Pastor: A Q&A With Bryant Wright<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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    Here are some simple spiritual drills to engage in before responding to disappointments, heartbreaks, and breakups:<\/p>\n