{"id":32526,"date":"2022-09-10T16:13:00","date_gmt":"2022-09-10T21:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/11-statistical-tips-for-a-healthy-marriage\/"},"modified":"2022-09-10T16:13:00","modified_gmt":"2022-09-10T21:13:00","slug":"11-statistical-tips-for-a-healthy-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/11-statistical-tips-for-a-healthy-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"11 Statistical Tips for a Healthy Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"
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By Aaron Earls<\/em><\/p>\n

As millions of Americans celebrate love this Valentine\u2019s Day, there are several statistical facts that can help a marriage start off healthy and stay that way for the long run.<\/p>\n

Here are 11 tips to keep your marriage healthy.<\/p>\n

1. Use premarital counseling.<\/strong> If you aren\u2019t married yet, make sure you include this in your marriage preparation. Research finds couples are 31 percent less likely to get divorced if they have some pre-marriage training.<\/p>\n

2. Don\u2019t live together before marriage.<\/strong> While some may claim cohabitation is needed to test compatibility, it actually increases the likelihood couples divorce before their 20th anniversary.<\/p>\n

Women who refrain from living with their future husband have a 57 percent probability the marriage will last at least two decades. Those who cohabitate decrease the likelihood of a lasting marriage to 46 percent. The same trends hold true for men.<\/p>\n

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3. Don\u2019t assume divorce is inevitable.<\/strong> You shouldn\u2019t even assume half of marriages fail. In reality, nearly three-quarters of currently married people (72 percent) are still with their first spouse.<\/p>\n

4. Make church attendance a priority.<\/strong> Couples who regularly go to church together report higher levels of happiness than those who don\u2019t. More than 3 in 4 regularly attending couples (78 percent) say they are \u201cvery happy\u201d or \u201cextremely happy\u201d in their relationship.<\/p>\n

5. Pray together.<\/strong> Almost 8 in 10 couples who pray together almost every week or more (78 percent) say they are \u201cvery happy\u201d or \u201cextremely happy\u201d in their relationship. By comparison, only 61 percent who prayed less frequently report the same level of happiness.<\/p>\n

6. Be involved in your church.<\/strong> Having friends who also attend religious services increases a couple\u2019s likelihood of happiness. More than three-quarters of couples who have friends who attend church with them (76 percent) say they are very or extremely happy.<\/p>\n

Among regular churchgoing individuals who divorce, 7 in 10 report attending church once a week or more three months prior to their separation. For those in healthy marriages, the weekly attendance is 87 percent.<\/p>\n

7. Sweat the small stuff.<\/strong> Social researcher Shaunti Feldhahn says small things really matter. \u201cBy far the biggest surprise to me was how big these little things were,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

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Simple day-to-day habits like saying \u201cthank you,\u201d showing affection, leaving a voice mail or sending a text to say \u201cI love you,\u201d or praising a spouse in public were commonplace among the happiest couples.<\/p>\n

8. Think the best, but don\u2019t expect perfection from your spouse.<\/strong> Even in the midst of an argument, 99 percent of highly happy couples believe their spouse cares for them. Among struggling couples, only 59 percent believe that to be the case.<\/p>\n

Fewer than half of happy couples (46 percent) are bothered when their spouse doesn\u2019t live up to their expectations, while 3 of 4 struggling couples (75 percent) say they are upset by it.<\/p>\n

9. Try to outdo each other.<\/strong> Among Feldhahn\u2019s highly happy couples, most were competitive at trying to serve their spouse and family. If one has a hard week or has taken extra responsibilities, the other tries to pay them back.<\/p>\n

Feldhahn says happy couples try to keep score; they just keep score differently. They look to be the one who serves the most.<\/p>\n

10. Fight smart<\/strong>. It\u2019s not that happy couples never argue, but they fight differently than those who are struggling. Happy couples may go to bed upset, but they deal with any hurt feelings that remain when both people are thinking more clearly.<\/p>\n

Happy couples also have a signal to let the other person know things will be fine. Seven in 10 happy couples say they have a \u201cwe\u2019re OK\u201d signal after they fight. Only 22 percent of struggling couples have a similar signal.<\/p>\n

11. Ditch \u201cPlan B.\u201d<\/strong> Feldhahn says the happiest couples are \u201call in\u201d and have no backup plan in case the marriage doesn\u2019t work out. She says many newlyweds think they need to keep a separate bank account or set aside a nest egg in case their marriage fails. That\u2019s counterproductive, she says.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe act of trying to protect yourself\u2014in case it all goes wrong\u2014is more likely to make it all go wrong,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

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Aaron Earls<\/h2>\n

@WardrobeDoor<\/p>\n

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Aaron is a writer for LifewayResearch.com.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n