5597<\/b> Pyruvic Acid In Thalamic Cells<\/b><\/p>\n
A biochemist announced that within a hundred years neurologists would cope with the inherent evils of mankind on a scientific, physiological basis. He said, \u201cThen we will not say a man is vicious, criminal, or immoral. Instead we will know that he has too much pyruvic acid in his thalamic cells, or that there is no carboxylase in his thalamus. We will be able to tell whether or not he grew enough association neurones to descend from his cortex so that he has enough acetylcholine in his midbrain or mesencephalon!\u201d<\/p>\n
5598<\/b> Russian Line-Up<\/b><\/p>\n
Auto races were held in Prague with only two cars entered\u2014an American Ford and a Russian Moskvich. The Ford won\u2014way ahead of the other. Prague newspapers reported: \u201cThe Soviet Moskvich placed second, while the American Ford was next to the last.\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Denni Hlasatel<\/p>\n
5599<\/b> Stethoscope and Handcuffs<\/b><\/p>\n
A doctor says that one evening when he was driving rather fast he made the mistake of passing a police car. At once it speeded up to catch him. Thinking fast, the doctor picked up his stethoscope from the seat beside him and waved it out the window. The officer saluted respectfully and slowed down. <\/p>\n
But that\u2019s not the end of the story. \u201cA day or two later,\u201d the doctor says, \u201cwhen I was on the same road a police car speeded past me. I recognized the officer and he recognized me. With a friendly nod he stuck his hand out of the window and waved a pair of handcuffs at me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Evening Chronicle<\/i><\/p>\n
5600<\/b> Why Lady Had No License<\/b><\/p>\n
In New Zealand a woman who drove for 25 years without a license explained to the judge who fined her, \u201cI only drive on roads that have very little traffic. And none of those roads lead to an office where I could apply for a driver\u2019s license.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014NANA-WNS<\/i><\/p>\n
5601<\/b> Boy\u2019s Adherence To Strike<\/b><\/p>\n
When Montgomery County, Maryland, schools were shut down by a strike, one father suggested that his teenage son devote five hours a day to studying. \u201cI\u2019m keeping my mind a blank,\u201d the boy replied, \u201cbecause I don\u2019t want to be a strikebreaker.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Washington Post<\/i><\/p>\n
5602<\/b> Medical Wastebaskets<\/b><\/p>\n
During our medical school days, we had several wastebaskets. One of the most common at that time was the term \u201cvirus infection.\u201d Nobody then had seen a virus although its existence was suspected, and to say that a fever which could not be brought down, or an uncontrollable headache, was due to a \u201cvirus\u201d was the best way out of an embarrassing situation. You could not prove the diagnosis, but neither could nobody disprove it. Although you did not cure the patient you still maintained your reputation as a diagnostician. As a result, virus diseases at that time accounted for loss of weight that could not be explained, undetected tuberculosis, backaches, stomach aches, in fact, any condition that the doctor could not cure. <\/p>\n
5603<\/b> Why Thief Came Down<\/b><\/p>\n
Found in an Indian storybook, entitled Katha Manjari<\/i>: One day a thief climbed up a coconut tree in a garden to steal the fruit. The gardener heard the noise, and while he was running from his house, giving the alarm, the thief hastily descended from the tree. \u201cWhy were you up that tree?\u201d asked the gardener. The thief replied, \u201cMy brother, I went up to gather grass for my calf.\u201d \u201cHa! ha! Is there grass, then, on a coconut tree?\u201d said the gardener. \u201cNo,\u201d said the thief, \u201cbut I did not know, therefore I came down again.\u201d<\/p>\n
5604<\/b> Turkish Story<\/b><\/p>\n
And we have a variant of this in the Turkish jest of the fellow who went into a garden and pulled up carrots, turnips, and other kinds of vegetable, some of which he put into a sack, and some into his bosom. The gardener, coming suddenly on the spot, laid hold of him, and said, \u201cWhat are you seeking here?\u201d The simpleton replied, \u201cFor some days past a great wind has been blowing, and that wind blew me hither.\u201d \u201cBut who pulled up these vegetables?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAs the wind blew very violently, it cast me here and there; and whatever I laid hold of in the hope of saving myself remained in my hands.\u201d \u201cAh,\u201d said the gardener, \u201cbut who filled this sack with them?\u201d \u201cWell, that is the very question I was about to ask myself when you came up.\u201d<\/p>\n
5605<\/b> Sour Grapes<\/b><\/p>\n
A hungry fox tried to reach some clusters of grapes which he saw hanging from a vine trained on a tree, but they were too high. So he went off and comforted himself by saying: \u201cThey weren\u2019t ripe anyhow.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Fables of Aesop<\/i><\/p>\n
5606<\/b> A Speeder\u2019s Excuse<\/b><\/p>\n
From the Woodstock, Ont., Sentinel-Review<\/i>: \u201cOur American visitors are normally welcome here, but occasionally they reveal some odd notions about our country. Charged with driving at 74 m.p.h., a Michigan man gave a captivating explanation. He thought that, since the Canadian gallon is bigger than the U.S. gallon, miles might be longer north of the border. To cover 60 Canadian miles in an hour, he felt his speedometer should show at least 70 m.p.h. The magistrate clarified the error and fined him in Canadian dollars, which are smaller than U.S. dollars.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Selected<\/p>\n
5607<\/b> The Librarian\u2019s Laugh<\/b><\/p>\n
At the Library of Congress the other day, reports The New York Times<\/i>, a reference librarian heard a piping voice on the other side of her desk. Looking down, she spied a 9-year-old researcher, his head barely the edge of the shelf. <\/p>\n
\u201cSay,\u201d she said, \u201cdon\u2019t you know you\u2019re supposed to have someone with you when you come here.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s all right,\u201d came another voice, \u201che\u2019s with me.\u201d The librarian leaned further over the edge of her desk\u2014and looked into the scrubbed, beaming face of a 6-year-old. <\/p>\n
5608<\/b> The Sheik\u2019s Birthday<\/b><\/p>\n
A famous Arab sheik once gave a birthday party for his son. Wishing to try the guests, each guest was to bring a small skin full of wine and pour it into a jar at the gate. <\/p>\n
One of the guests said: \u201cIf I fill my skin with water and pour it in, none will notice.\u201d And he did. In the feast the time came to serve the wine. They dipped from the great jar and it contained only water, for everyone had said: \u201cMy contribution wouldn\u2019t be missed,\u201d and poured water. <\/p>\n
5609<\/b> The Perfumed Lake<\/b><\/p>\n
A prince of India once dreamt that he owned a garden more lovely than all the gardens of the world. What made it particularly attractive was a beautiful lake, which was different from all others in that its water was pure perfume whose fragrance could be caught from every spot in the garden. <\/p>\n
Upon awaking he decided to make his dream come true. He did not have enough money to fill a lake with perfume. After considerable thought he came upon the idea of inviting every person in the surrounding country to a great party. Each person was to bring a small glass of perfume and empty it into the lake. <\/p>\n
On the appointed day the roads to the prince\u2019s lake were filled with people of all ages, sizes and classes. In the hand of each was a vial of perfume, which each person emptied into the lake. <\/p>\n
To the surprise of everyone, however, no lovely fragrance came from the lake. The prince did some investigating. He took a sample of the water near the spot where everyone was emptying his perfume. It was just ordinary water. Yes, you guessed it. Everyone thought that his little vial of water instead of perfume would make little difference. <\/p>\n
5610<\/b> Dreaming About Geography<\/b><\/p>\n
Billy went to sleep in geography class. His teacher woke him up. \u201cBilly,\u201d she cried, \u201cI\u2019m ashamed of you! Were you really sleeping?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, ma\u2019am,\u201d replied Billy, \u201cbut I was dreaming I was doing my geography.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2014Pal<\/i><\/p>\n
5611<\/b> Epigram On Self-Excusing<\/b><\/p>\n
\u2022 Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. <\/p>\n
\u2022 Henry Youngman says his unemployed brother-in-law had to giveup his last job because of illness. His boss became sick of him. <\/p>\n
\u2014The American Weekly <\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
5597 Pyruvic Acid In Thalamic Cells A biochemist announced that within a hundred years neurologists would cope with the inherent evils of mankind on a scientific, physiological basis. He said, \u201cThen we will not say a man is vicious, criminal, or immoral. Instead we will know that he has too much pyruvic acid in his … Continue reading “SELF-EXCUSING”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5278","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sermons"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5278","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5278"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5278\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5278"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5278"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.biblia.work\/sermons\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5278"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}