43 HEALTHY BOUNDARIES PROTECT PARENTS AND
CHILDREN.

“We never seem to have any privacy,” complained the parents.

These parents had failed to set healthy boundaries to protect themselves and their children. Their problem centered around the bedroom. As small children, their children had been permitted to sleep with their parents and come in and out of their bedroom without permission. The children were allowed to go through their parents’ closets and drawers. They took whatever money they saw laying around in the bedroom.

As the children grew older, the parents regretted their lack of privacy and intimacy. They had failed to create healthy boundaries around their bedroom. The same principle can be applied to other areas of family living.

Boundaries are not walls. They are simply private spaces that protect a person from invasion and abuse. What boundaries have you set to protect yourself and your children?

Within healthy boundaries exist blessings. For example, within the boundaries of using substances, we allowed our children to drink ice tea and coffee, but not drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes. We taught them that outside of these healthy boundaries existed addiction, poor health, and even death. Inside the boundaries of treating our bodies right existed health and life.

Boundaries can focus on dos instead of don’ts. Do eat healthy. Do pray. Do read and memorize the work. Do your homework. Do watch wholesome TV and listen to wholesome music. In order to set these boundaries, we must openly examine and discuss with our children what is “wholesome” and what is “polluted.” What boundaries exist in your family for morality, privacy, holiness, spiritual discipline, education, TV watching, playing games, using computers, etc.? Discuss boundaries and set them with your children. In doing that, you will teach your children about healthy boundaries.

The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul; The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple; The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes; Moreover by them Your servant is warned, And in keeping them there is great reward (Ps. 19:7–8, 11). Action Steps I/We Need to Take