56 REPLACE CRITICISM WITH AFFIRMATION.

“Dad, the only time you ever talk to me is to point out my mistakes,” complained the son.

Make a journal. Log how many times a day you say something negative to your child. Then log all the positive, affirming, and encouraging things you say daily to your child. Which list is longer?

We sometimes get into the bad habit of pointing out all the things wrong with our children, but fail to affirm them when they show responsibility and a healthy attitude.

Replace criticism with kind correction and teaching. Find ways to say to your child …

“I thank God for ____________________________________.”

“I appreciate you when _________________________________.”

“I am proud of you because _____________________________.”

“You are special to me.”

“I love you.”

“Will you pray for me today about ________________________?”

“I want to thank you for ________________________________.”

Positive affirmation makes deposits into the emotional bank of your child. Criticism makes withdrawals. Children grow and mature when they have a positive balance in their emotional bank account. But they become critical and cynical, rebellious and angry when they must carry a negative balance.

Have you made any deposits lately? Is your child’s emotional bank account overflowing or overdrawn?

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing (1 Thess. 5:11).