64 THE DOOR OF TOUGH LOVE MUST OPEN BOTH
WAYS.

My teenage daughter and I had a long talk. She had been in a state of increasing rebellion for over two years. Now she was sneaking out in the middle of the night to be with her friends. Our relationship was strained to the maximum.

So, we went on a long walk to have a long talk. I shared my feelings and she shared hers.

Then I made a statement I never imagined I would have to make, “Either you will accept us as your parents and obey us or you will have to move out.”

She looked at me in disbelief and then started crying. My love had to be tough for her sake. Her behavior was destroying both her and our family. I love and believed in her, but I knew that a line had to be drawn in the sand.

We reconciled with tears and forgiveness. At times, separation is the only path back to restoration. The rift becomes so deep that a child must experience the consequences of their behavior in order to return back to what’s right.

The separation doesn’t mean that the door back home is closed and locked.

The door is always open and the light is always on for your return, we say to our children in tough love. The door of tough love always swings out if they must leave and in for their return.

And the younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the portion of goods that falls to me.’ So he divided to them his livelihood. And not many days after, the younger son gathered all together, journeyed to a far country, and there wasted his possessions with prodigal living (Luke 15:12–14).