48 GOD CHANGES; YOU ENCOURAGE

One of the most common prayers that spiritually immature mates pray concerning their spouses is, “God change my mate.”

The prayer of a spiritually mature husband or wife is, “God change me!”

You cannot change your spouse. All your cajoling, nagging, criticisms and manipulations will not change your spouse. Besides, what you want changed may not be the real need for growth in your mate’s feelings, attitudes, opinions or behaviors.

Encouragement works wonders to create a desire for change in your mate’s life. Encourage her strengths. Look for her gifts and talents. Affirm at every turn.

Change always happens from within. Pressure to change that comes from without—a spouse or another person trying to force change—simply doesn’t work. Besides, when change comes from God’s Spirit, the power to grow in that change also comes from God.

Try this: Ask God to show you where you need to change in order to grow in your marriage. When God answers, pray, “Lord, I’m willing.” If you cannot pray that, then pray, “Lord, I’m willing to be made willing.”

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

1 Thess. 5:11 NIV