Author: Administrador

Are you problem-focused or purpose-focused? Problem-focused parents always concentrate on the child’s problems. They constantly worry about the child’s attitudes and behaviors. They suffer great anxiety over a child’s performance in sports and in school. Anything a child does or says that falls the least bit short of their expectations becomes a crisis for the … Continue reading “31 INSTILLING PURPOSE IN CHILDREN PREPARES
THEM FOR TRIALS, TESTS, AND TRIBULATION.”

“Dad, why do you have a radar detector in your car?” queried the teenage son. We insist that our children obey God’s laws and the laws of the state. We demand that they respect God-ordained authority. But do we teach them what’s right by both example and lifestyle? If it’s all right for me to … Continue reading “26 TEACHING RIGHT FROM WRONG CONSIDERS THE
CHOICE, COMPARES TO GOD, CHOOSES THE RIGHT, AND COUNTS THE COST.”

“What’s your purpose in doing that?” asked the parent. Help your child write a purpose statement for their life. As they grow older, the purpose statement may expand. Jesus indicates that primary purpose is loving God wholeheartedly and loving others and ourselves fervently. Are you willing to teach that to your children? A simple purpose … Continue reading “27 TEACHING CHILDREN PURPOSE EMPOWERS THEM
TO PLAN.”

“If it’s true for you, it’s true for me,” instructed the parent. We cannot teach what we do not live. We cannot say, “Do as I say, not as I do.” God wants us to be consistent as well as truthful. Why? Because truth is consistent. The world teaches children relativism. But Scripture teaches absolute … Continue reading “28 ABSOLUTE TRUTH IS TRUE FOR ALL TIMES,
FOR ALL PLACES AND FOR ALL PEOPLE—PARENTS AND CHILDREN INCLUDED.”

Answering “why” early saves sorrow later. “Johnny’s questions seem endless.” The early years of childhood are filled with a curious stream of questions about why. Once you have given the same answers over and over again, repeat the questions and see if your children have “gotten it.” Deposit truth early in your child. Later in … Continue reading “23 ANSWERING YOUR CHILD’S QUESTIONS EARLY
DEPOSITS ANSWERS FOR THEIR LATE QUESTIONS WHEN YOU’RE NOT AROUND.”

“Dad is always preaching at me,” complained the son. Sermonettes rarely communicate lasting truths. Children are much more inclined to listen after they have been listened to. Are you willing to ask the right questions and then listen to your child’s answers? And remember that a child’s initial response, decision, or problem may not be … Continue reading “24 COUNSELING TEENAGERS ISN’T
ADVICE-GIVING; IT’S ASKING RIGHT QUESTIONS FOLLOWED BY MUCH LISTENING.”

The hardest three words a parent may ever have to say to a child are, “I was wrong.” However, such confessions can build trust and intimacy between parents and children. We train our children to confess their wrongs by modeling such confession ourselves. At times, we will react emotionally and rashly to our children’s behaviors … Continue reading “25 WHEN WRONG, GO TO YOUR CHILD: ADMIT IT,
QUIT IT, FORGET IT.”

Too often, we find ourselves reacting to a child’s negative behavior and making “on the spot” decisions about what we say and do. Our reactions often become overreactions which fail to teach our child anything except that we’re out of control of ourselves. Being proactive means … •     Contracts are set in advance. •     Boundaries are drawn … Continue reading “21 BE PROACTIVE, NOT REACTIVE. SET RULES
AND CONSEQUENCES IN ADVANCE. THE OLDER THE CHILD THE MORE THE CHILD
PARTICIPATES IN SETTING BOUNDARIES.”

“Don’t do that,” repeated the mother hundreds of times a day. She was frustrated. The child became resistive and oppositional to everything the mother said. The whole cycle of unproductive, ineffective parenting could be reversed with a question instead of a demand. “Why are you doing that?” Early in childhood, a parent needs to teach … Continue reading “22 SOLVING PROBLEMS FOR YOUR CHILDREN NEVER
TEACHES PROBLEM SOLVING.”

Immediate gratification is taught by our culture. We have fast foods, instant answers, and microwave meals. Our children learn from TV that major problems can be solved in half-hour sitcoms. Gratifying our wants may bring momentary pleasure, but the fun is short-lived. Afterwards, the long-term pain can bring tragic consequences. Instant credit brings long-term debt. … Continue reading “18 DISCIPLINE ALLOWS SHORT-TERM PAIN FOR
LONG-TERM PLEASURE; PERMISSIVENESS ALLOWS SHORT-TERM PLEASURE FOR LONG-TERM
PAIN.”