Sermons and Biblical Studies

Dobson wrote about the “strong-willed” and the “compliant” child. That speaks of a child’s temperament. Which can be observed as early as infancy. Some children quietly observe the stimuli around them. Others aggressively explore the same stimuli. And the feelings that they express are often triggered by their temperaments. An active, curious child frustrated in … Continue reading “19 FEELINGS ARISE, TEMPERAMENT MAY BE
INBORN, BUT RESPONSES TO FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS DEVELOP ATTITUDES AND BEHAVIORS
THAT ARE RIGHT OR WRONG.”

Immediate gratification is taught by our culture. We have fast foods, instant answers, and microwave meals. Our children learn from TV that major problems can be solved in half-hour sitcoms. Gratifying our wants may bring momentary pleasure, but the fun is short-lived. Afterwards, the long-term pain can bring tragic consequences. Instant credit brings long-term debt. … Continue reading “18 DISCIPLINE ALLOWS SHORT-TERM PAIN FOR
LONG-TERM PLEASURE; PERMISSIVENESS ALLOWS SHORT-TERM PLEASURE FOR LONG-TERM
PAIN.”

“You’re a bad boy,” said the mother. “Son, you’re stupid,” scolded the dad. Labeling the child conveys the wrong message. We are building children up, not tearing them down. We either speak blessings or curses over our children. What we speak over children becomes self-fulfilling prophecy. Call children “bad” and they will become bad. Label … Continue reading “17 LABEL BEHAVIORS, NOT CHILDREN.”

Dr. Spock is not the ultimate authority on parenting. Nor is Dobson or any other person. The ultimate authority on parenting is God. God is our Father. Our authority does not rest in our role or our position. God gives us an awesome responsibility for training up children. But that responsibility does not make us … Continue reading “16 BECAUSE YOU “SAY SO” DOESN’T MAKE IT SO;
BECAUSE GOD “SAYS SO” MAKES IT SO.”

Earlier I mentioned Mr. Spoon. When our children were young, we had a large wooden serving spoon and used it for our “rod of discipline.” We travel extensively in southeast Asia. There, the rod of correction is a cane. In other places, it is a neutral object meant to give minimal pain. The purpose of … Continue reading “15 SPARE THE ROD; SPOIL THE CHILD.
APPROPRIATELY APPLIED PAIN TO THE BUTT GETS A CHILD’S ATTENTION AND ASSOCIATES
WRONG WITH PAIN INSTEAD OF PLEASURE.”

“I have to tell Angela the same thing over and over again,” complained her mom. A child simply doing the right thing isn’t enough to effect lasting change. Only repentance brings true change in a child’s life. To repent means to change direction. Change is integral to repentance. Doing penance simply repeats an acceptable behavior. … Continue reading “14 REPENTANCE MUST PRECEDE PENANCE OR
CHANGE WILL NEVER HAPPEN IN YOUR CHILD’S BEHAVIOR OR CHARACTER.”

“You’re grounded for the next month,” the irate parent screamed. Yes, the child had serious transgressed one of the rules. However, the parent has now created a bigger problem. Out of angry emotion, the parent has levied an excessive, punishing consequence. In reality, the grounding may only be for a few days, but the parent … Continue reading “13 CONTRACTS MUTUALLY AGREED UPON BETWEEN
PARENT AND CHILD PRESCRIBE CONSEQUENCES IN ADVANCE.”

“I know my dad would kill me if he ever found out what I’m doing,” confided the worried teenager. Fearing a parent rarely instills obedience. In the early years, fear may serve to control a child’s behavior. But as the child gets older, fear doesn’t deter wrong behavior. Fear simply motivates an older child or … Continue reading “12 FEARING A PARENT INSTILLS A SPIRIT OF
DECEPTION AND DECEIT; FEARING GOD INSPIRES RESPECT FOR AUTHORITY.”

How do you assess your child’s attitudes? What they say doesn’t always reflect what’s in their hearts. You ultimately know a child’s attitude by behavior, not words. Watch both their overt behaviors and their non-verbal communications. Note the following: •     Facial expressions •     Eye contact •     Body language—movement and position of hands and legs, gestures, etc. •     Tone of … Continue reading “11 RIGHT BEHAVIOR REFLECTS RIGHT ATTITUDE.”

“Angie, I told you to stop touching that,” Mom warns. “Angie, stop that right now, or else,” Mom threatens more loudly. “Angie, if you don’t stop, I will spank you,” Mom gravely announces even more loudly. “Angie, right this minute stop or I will spank you. I mean it now,” Mom yells as Angie continues … Continue reading “10 CONSISTENCY MEANS PARENTAL WARNINGS ARE
ALWAYS FOLLOWED BY IMMEDIATE, APPROPRIATE CORRECTION.”