1 Samuel 2:12-17 – The Greatest Failure – Bible study

1Sam 2:12-17 The Greatest Failure Yet once again, we are meeting on a week of another mass shooting. As you all know, a young man went into a church is South Carolina and killed 9 people. The whole world will speculate on the causes and I am certain that they are many, but I will throw one possible reason into the pot. Some where in the list of reasons I would say that the home had some failures. I am not trying to lay blame. The parents may have done all they could have done, but even if they did, the home failed. I do not say this to judge. My only goal is to show the importance of the home and to help those gathered in this church to be the best they can be for the Lord. Today being Fathers Day, let us direct our attention to fathers. What might be a fathers greatest failure? What does God expect of a father? Look with me at the life of Eli. Eli was the priest, prophet, and judge over Israel in these days. The Scriptures reveal him to be a good and godly man. He ministered faithfully; he judged Israel righteously, and he stood by the Word constantly. Eli was a perfect man before God in every area of his life except one – his sons, Hophni and Phinehas. These two men were wicked and used their position to profit and abuse the people. \#14-15\ They took the best of the offerings. \#16\ They extorted by use of force if necessary. \#22\ They lay with the woman who either served or gathered at the temple. The world has various standards for measuring a preacher. Some measure by his charisma, others by popularity, a few by his message. I judge my own ministry by three standards. 1. My testimony – life and character 2. My doctrinal accuracy in the Word 3. My family Apparently, all that Eli ever did to these men was lightly rebuke them. 1Sam 2:23 And he said unto them, Why do ye such things? for I hear of your evil dealings by all this people. 24 Nay, my sons; for it is no good report that I hear: ye make the LORDS people to transgress. 25 If one man sin against another, the judge shall judge him: but if a man sin against the LORD, who shall intreat for him? Notwithstanding they hearkened not unto the voice of their father, because the LORD would slay them. That wasnt enough so God rebuked Eli \#2:27-36\ and prophesies his familys removal from service. A sin of Elis is mentioned \#2:29\ and a principal is given \#30\. In calling Samuel to take Elis place, God made it clear that He expected Eli to stop his sons from their wicked behavior \#1Sam 3:13\. Because he did not, God brought all of the judgments which He had promised upon Eli. \#1Sam 4:10-11, 15-18\. Catch the significance of what we have read. Eli appeared to be a perfect man in every area of his life but one. Men, it does not matter how successful you are in your career; if you fail at home, you fail. I. Fatherhood is a life-long commitment. A. A father is not just one who performs the duties of a biological donor. 1. Fatherhood is a commitment, a relationship, and a responsibility. a. Fathers do not bring children into this world and then leave! b. Fathers do not bring children into this world then ignore them. 2. Fatherhood is a job that requires a life-long commitment. B. Consider parenting to be a jobthe most important job you will ever hold. 1. To get an important job, you must have certain credentials. 2. What are the credentials to be a father? a. The ability to maintain a relationship. (1) If you have never had a good relationship with others, you do not qualify to be a father. (2) What kind of relationships? (a) A relationship with parents i. Too many want to excuse the relationship they have with their parents. ii. I know not all parents are good parents. In fact, some are completely the opposite. iii. However, no matter how good or how bad your parents were, you have to have some kind of relationship with them. iv. And there is one thing your parents and your children are always going to have in commonyou dont get to pick them. v. How do you get along with the people in your life you dont pick out? (b) A relationship with a wife i. Again, people offer a lot excuses for not being able to get along with their wife (wives, girl friends). ii. Here is the thing about your women. You are picking them. iii. If there is a problem with the women you are picking then the problem is not with your women but with the picker. iv. Maybe it is the type of women you find attractive. Maybe it is where you are looking. Maybe it is just you bring out the worst in them. v. Whatever it is, you need to find and fix that problem before you are ready for fatherhood. b. The ability to fulfill your commitments. (1) Life is a series of responsibilities. (2) How many are you fulfilling? a. Did you finish school? b. Have you kept a job? c. Do you have a good marriage? (3) Fatherhood will NOT be your first successful relationship in life! a. Simply put, it is too hard and requires too much sacrifice. b. If you cant get along with anyone else and have not successfully completed any other task, please, keep your biological donations to yourself. c. Relationships with parents and a wife are tough, but they are nothing compared with the difficulty in raising a child. c. I have deliberately skipped what I think to be one of the first and most important credentials of any potential father, the relationship with God. (1) Before a man becomes a father, he should first make a commitment to God and then keep a relationship with God. (2) Children are not just bodies and minds. They are eternal souls. (3) Only someone who knows God can direct another to God. (4) Potential dad, your walk with God should have had three steps: (a) A commitment that begin with salvation. (b) A relationship which included total surrender. (c) A responsibility that accepted Gods service. II. Eli did all of this but still he failed as a father. Where did Eli go wrong? A. Eli forgot his first duty. 1. Did you know it is a pre-requisite that a preacher have a godly family? 1Tim 3:1 This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. 2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; 3 Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; 4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; 5 (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) 2. If God puts a priority on a preacher having a home that seeks after Him, dont you think he puts it on all homes? B. Eli committed three sins: 1. \#1Sam 2:29\ He honored his kids above God. a. That means that Eli did what pleased them rather than what pleased God. (1) No parent ever does a child a favor by letting him break Gods commandments. (2) No parent ever does a child a favor by letting him disrespect God. (3) No parent ever does a child a favor by taking the childs side over God. (4) No parent ever does a child a favor by taking the childs side over any authorityeven if the authority is wrong. b. Because that child is going to have to live under authority all of his life and then stand before God and God will not change. (1) The world has convinced themselves that there is no God or that He does not care. They are wrong on both accounts and standing before Him is going to be an most unpleasant experience! (2) Mans abilities have increased to the extent that we are doing worse things today than any other generation before us. That is not surprising. considering the judgment that we are building up to. c. What is a parent to do? A parent is to tell their children what is right and what is wrong and then do whatever they can to keep them on the side of right! (1) I am afraid that in these evil days, some good parents will not be able to keep their children on the right side. (2) The devils power is growing and a lot of that is what we are exposing our children to today. (a) Television, music, games, images (b) Public schools and even some Christians schools and churches are a mix of the sorriest and the spiritual. 2. Eli failed to put up boundaries. a. We all need boundaries. (1) A boundary is a definition of what is right and wrong. (2) (Work is all right; stealing is wrong. Marriage is all right, adultery is wrong. Compliments are all right, flattery is wrong. Eating is all right, gluttony is wrong.) b. Consequences are praise and promotion when we do right, correction and discipline when we do wrong. (Hophni and Phinehas were way past the light rebuke stage. They were in the removal from office and being stoned to death stage!) 3. Eli failed to enforce his own rules and words. a. I was reminded again this week of the vanity of barking out instructions with no consequences. b. If an instruction is not worth backing up, it is not worth giving. c. Parents, be careful what you tell your children to do and be double careful what you tell them you will do if they dont do it. d. Make both your instructions and your repercussions godly and loving, then enforce the boundaries you set up. C. Eli stood before Gods judgment for his failure as a father! 1. Dads, we may or may not be successful as fathers. The end result is up to God. 2. However, if we do not try to do things Gods way, we will stand before God guilty and, in my mind, even worse, our children will likely belong to the devil. 3. Eli paid with his life and the souls of his children. People are asking, "Whats wrong with our children today? They dont want to work; they have no respect for authority; they are sex-crazed and violent. Whats wrong with our children?" I say, "The question is not just what is wrong with the children. It is what is wrong with our dads?"