Proverbs 31:28 – What A Good Mother Should Be (2) – Bible study

Proverbs 31:28 What A Good Mother Should Be Click here for the first part of the message. We began this morning looking at our topic, and although I tried to keep the message short (having only two main points in the outline), I was unable to complete it in the time I had allotted. So tonight, we continue that message. Our message began by looking at Solomon and what he relied on to judge between two mothers. He relied on the nature of the mother. Solomon predicted that the true mother of a baby would do something to keep her baby alive, and she did. That tells me that there is a motherly nature in most women; however, our society today is doing its best to squelch that nature. A woman whose ambition in life is to be a good wife and rear godly children is subtlety made to feel as though she is a second-rate woman. However, according to the Word of God, not only is she not second rate, she is accomplishing just what God created her to do. Understanding that, we began to look at what it takes to be a good mother. It takes more than just being fertile, or pregnant, or even birthing a child. These messages are about being a perfect mother. No woman has ever been a perfect mother. All have made mistakes and all will. God does not expect any parent to be perfect. These message are about being a better mother, about being the best you can be as a mother. So what does it take to be good mother? This morning, I preached the first point. I. A good mother should be a nurturer. A. To nurture is to care for, to provide for, to develop a child properly. B. There are several areas in which every child must be nurtured. 1. The physical needs to be nurtured. 2. The emotional needs to be nurtured. 3. The spiritual needs to be nurtured. II. Not only should a good mother be nurturer, she should develop godly qualities. A. There are many qualities we should work to develop. 1. Honestly, there are no good character qualities which should not be developed; but in thinking about this message, I have tried to select qualities that are missed in many homes today. 2. Most of these qualities will require great attention and effort to develop. The world today does not see any value to them. 3. Those of us who are Christians and want to rear God-fearing, God- loving, and God-obeying children, must certainly develop the qualities that reflect our Gods character. 4. Since mothers have such an important role in the lives of children, they must certainly do so. B. What kind of qualities? 1. A good mother should have strong moral character. Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. a. A virtuous woman is a woman pure woman, a woman with morals. b. One of the most important tasks a mother has is to help in the training of a child. Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. (1) Dads, you and I are primarily charged by God to train our children. (2) The book of Proverbs is the Bible book for child training. (3) It was written by a father to help him instruct his son. (4) I find it interesting that Gods commands to rearing a child are given to the father. (a) Of Abraham, God said. Genesis 18:19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him. (b) Moses spoke these words to all of Israel, but primarily, he is speaking to the men of Israel. Deuteronomy 4:9 Only take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life: but teach them thy sons, and thy sons sons; (c) Paul in the New Testament, strictly charges the fathers. Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. (5) Mothers, the task falls to you to aid your husband in the proper rearing of your child. c. However, no parent can teach what they do not know or give what they do not have. (1) You can not teach character to a child if you do not have it. (2) Mothers, you need a strong, moral character. d. We have all known that men can be real dogs when it comes to character. (1) We have all know shiftless, immoral, lazy men. (2) Women, in their effort to become man-like, have taken on the worst characteristics of moral-less men. (a) Women are more immoral now than ever before. i. Im not talking about gutter women. ii. Im talking about woman who are otherwise good now feel like they must sleep around to make it in a mans world. (b) Women are louder, more profane, more opinionated, more domineering, more stubbornall of the worst characteristics of men, women are adapting. e. It is not right for the men to be that way, and it is not right for the women to be that way. (1) Ladies, you need to develop a virtuous character. (2) You need to stay pure, stay clean, stay gentile, (3) Your character is your compass in life and a mothers character will likely be their childrens compass. f. Will your child (1) lie when the situation suits him? (2) steal when he can get away with it? (3) bully a smaller child? (4) blaspheme or use Gods name in vain? (5) Will he be a wife beater? (6) Will she be a tramp? a hooker? g. What will be your childs code of ethics? (1) Might I recommend the Bible? (2) Is the Bible old? Yes. Outdated? Never. (3) Just like it is the Book to teach you how to be a good mother, it will be the Book to teach your child how to live a good life. 2. A good mother should have a strong faith. 2 Timothy 1:5 When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also. a. Americas preoccupation is on money and success. (1) You may be one of the top 5% of those who own over half of Americas wealth, but you probably arent. (2) Your chances are better of being in the top 20% that owns 80% of Americas wealth, but it is still pretty slim. (3) However, you can give to your children something that will make them richer than the richest. b. You can give them a strong relationship with God. (1) Greed and the lust for money are not new to this age. (2) The Bible has much to say about it. (3) One of the most important things it says is that money cannot save a lost soul. Proverbs 11:4. Riches profit not in the day of wrath: but righteousness delivereth from death. Psalms 49:6 They that trust in their wealth, and boast themselves in the multitude of their riches; 7 None of them can by any means redeem his brother, nor give to God a ransom for him: 8 (For the redemption of their soul is precious, and it ceaseth for ever:) c. A real relationship with God is hard to ignore. (1) I cant give somebody elses testimony, but I will tell you that on more than one occasion, I have heard wayward souls testify that it was the faith of an older family member that brought them to Christ. (2) I am not talking about a "Sunday-morning, when the sun is shining and I dont have anything else to do faith." (3) Im talking about a real relationship with God faith. 3. A good mother should be contented. a. Since I mentioned money and wealth, lets address one of the biggest enemies to the home in this generation. (1) It is not drugs, alcohol, sex, or abortion. (2) Those are just symptoms of the problem. (3) The problem is discontentment. (4) Perhaps you think I over-exaggerate when I say that some of these modern-day problems are the results of discontentment, but I do not. (a) People are unhappy and looking for something else. (b) Whether you over-charge or get drunk, you are still looking for something else. 1 Timothy 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain. b. Children today are a very discontent lot. (1) For most children, it doesnt matter what they have, they want something else. (a) It has to be the newest, the fastest, the most stylish, and the most expensive. (b) That is not true of all children, but you know it is true of most. (2) Children and youth in America today, control a huge portion of the US economy. (a) Who do you think makes music stars? (b) It is not the adults who work for a living. It is the kids who dont. In the US there are over 57 million school age children and teenagers who spend about $100 billion each year of their own and their familys money on sweets, food, drinks, video and electronic products, toys, games, movies, sports, clothes and shoes. Additionally children 12 and under spend more than $11 billion of their own money and influence family spending decisions worth another $165 billion on food, household items like furniture, electrical appliances and computers, vacations, the family car and other spending. For example, one study estimated that children influenced $9 billion worth of car sales in 1994. One car dealer explains: "Sometimes, the child literally is our customer. I have watched the child pick out the car." http://www.uow.edu.au/~sharonb/children.html c. My point is that children are largely a discontent group, but they have to learn that behavior from someone. (1) Who? (2) From their parents. (3) Parents in our society have become very discontent. d. It has always been the nature of humans that a man wants to spend a wife wants to save. (1) Of course there are exceptions to every rule. (2) But it is in the nature of men to act impulsively. (3) It is in the nature of women to be cautious and move carefully. (4) Those opposites in nature produced a balance for the home. e. However, it recent years, the men have kept their impulsive nature and many women have joined them. (1) Mothers, you must be the voice of reason in the home. (2) Someone must think ahead, plan for the future. (3) Someone must be willing to do without and to make sacrifices for the good of the family. (4) Gentlemen, if you have a wife who tries to slow down your impulsive nature, thank God for her. 4. A good mother should have an organized home. a. The Bible does teach that a woman is the keeper of the home. Proverbs 31:12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. 13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. 14 She is like the merchants ships; she bringeth her food from afar. 15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. 16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. 17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. 18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. 19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. 20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. 22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. 24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. 25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. b. There is nothing wrong with the man helping out, but ladies, the home is your domain. (1) It is the place God has given you to operate. (2) How you operate your home will speak volumes about you. (3) Men who say what I am about to say have been called male chauvinist pigs so much, that few are willing to say it anymore, but (a) Ladies, you should know how to cook food. (b) You should know how to wash and iron. (c) You should know how to organize and operate a house. Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. (4) If you do these things, you are not the janitor or a servant. (5) You are fulfilling the role of housewife and mom and you ought to be insulted when some body tells you that if dont work like a man, dress like a man, think like a man, and act like a man that you are any less of a person. c. Your child needs a well structured, well-organized home to live and thrive in. (1) I cant prove that a cluttered house makes for a cluttered mind. (2) However, it seems reasonable to me that if you cant organize the outside, you arent going to be able to organize the inside. 5. A good mother should be a distinctive role model. Ge 1:27 male and female created he them. a. There is no doubt in mind that this is one of the greatest problems within the family today. b. More than ever, this world needs distinctive roles models. (1) Kids today do not know what sex they are. (2) High schoolers, junior high, even elementary-aged kids are announcing they are gay, bi-sexual, and transsexuals. c. That is not the way they were created and it is genetic. d. It is a failure on the part of society and the home to teach distinctive role models. e. If you want your son to stay a son and your daughter to stay a daughter, you must start living the sex God created you to be. (1) That includes how you dress, how you walk, your personal attitudes and behaviors, and what you will give your life to accomplish. (2) Mothers, your behavior, especially in your daughter, will be greatly multiplied. There is no joy more rewarding that being what God created you to be. Ladies, you do not need to be a man to be happy. And you do not need a career, money, or any other external to make you feel worthwhile. Just be what God created you to be.