Exegetical and Hermeneutical Commentary of Proverbs 14:10
The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
10. The poet of the Christian Year has caught something of the beauty and pathos of this proverb as he writes:
“Each in his hidden sphere of joy or woe
Our hermit spirits dwell and range apart.”
“Nor e’en the tenderest heart, and next our own,
Knows half the reasons why we smile or sigh”;
and Matthew Arnold (quoted by Horton):
“Yes! in the sea of life enisled,
With echoing straits between us thrown,
Dotting the shoreless watery waste,
We mortal millions live alone.
The islands feel the enclasping flow,
And then their endless bounds they know.”
It is worth quoting, if only as a foil to it, the prosaic apothegm, “None knows the weight of another’s burden,” Geo. Herbert, Jac. Prud.
Fuente: The Cambridge Bible for Schools and Colleges
A striking expression of the ultimate solitude of each mans soul at all times, and not merely at the hour of death. Something there is in every sorrow, and in every joy, which no one else can share. Beyond that range it is well to remember that there is a Divine Sympathy, uniting perfect knowledge and perfect love.
Fuente: Albert Barnes’ Notes on the Bible
Pro 14:10
The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
Man unknown to man
You cannot completely know your fellow-man. Every man is, in a measure, self-contained. Alone are we born, one by one; alone do we die, one by one. It is not surprising that we must be, in a measure, unknown to others, since we do not even fully know ourselves. There are points of individuality in each man which render him distinct from every other. Men in their highest and deepest conditions are remarkably secretive. The extreme heights and depths lie in darkness. Learn, then, that we may not judge our brethren as though we understood them, and were competent to give a verdict upon them. If we desire to show sympathy to our brethren, let us not dream that this is an easy task. Study the art of sympathy. We all need sympathy, and there is but One who can fully give it to us.
I. The heart knows a bitterness peculiar to itself. This is true in a natural, common, and moral sense. Concerning any man this is true. The shoe pinches on every foot, and that foot alone knows where the pinch is felt. Do not intrude into the hidden sorrows of any. Most solemnly this is true concerning the godless man and concerning the awakened man. When the Holy Spirit begins to convince the man of sin, of righteousness, and of judgment, then the heart knoweth its own bitterness. And concerning the backslider. And concerning the tried believer. But the singularity of his suffering is the dream of the sufferer. Others have seen affliction too. Know thy sorrow well. And remember that the cure for bitterness of heart is to take it to your Lord at once.
II. The heart knows a sweetness which is all its own.
1. The joy of pardoned sin.
2. The bliss of vanquished evil.
3. The joy of perfect reconciliation with God.
4. The joy of accepted service.
5. The joy of answered prayer.
6. The joy of peace in the time of trouble.
7. The joy of communion with God. (C. H. Spurgeon.)
On the joy and the bitterness of the heart
The sources of the joy or bitterness of the heart are two.
1. A mans own mind of temper–a mans personal character. Every man is more connected with himself than with any external object. He is constantly a companion to himself in his own thoughts; and what he meets with there must, of all things, contribute most to his happiness or his disquiet. A good conscience, and good temper, prepare, even in the midst of poverty, a continual feast. How sadly the scene is reversed if a mans temper, instead of calmness and self-enjoyment, shall yield him nothing but disquiet and painful agitation. The wounds which the spirit suffers are owing chiefly to three causes: to folly, to passion, or to guilt. The external misfortunes of life, disappointments, poverty, and sickness are nothing in comparison of those inward distresses of mind occasioned by folly, by passion, and by guilt.
2. The connection in which a man stands with some of his fellow-creatures–a mans social feelings. Such causes of sorrow or joy are of an external nature. Having connected us in society by many ties, it is the decree of the Creator that these ties should prove, both during their subsistence and in their dissolution, causes of pleasure or pain immediately, and often deeply affecting the human heart. The most material circumstances of trouble or felicity, next to the state of our own mind and temper, are the sensations and affections which arise from the connections we have from others.
The practical improvement to which this doctrine leads:
1. Let it serve to moderate our passion for riches and high situations in the world. It is well known that the eager pursuit of these is the chief incentive to the crimes that fill the world. Then contemplate these things with an impartial eye.
2. Let these observations correct our mistakes, and check our complaints, concerning a supposed promiscuous distribution of happiness in this world. The charge of injustice brought against Providence rests entirely on this ground, that the happiness and misery of men may be estimated by the degree of their external prosperity. This is the delusion under which the multitude have always laboured, but which a just consideration of the invisible springs of happiness that affect the heart is sufficient to correct. Judge not of the real condition of men from what floats merely on the surface of their state.
3. Let us turn our attention to those internal sources of happiness or misery on which so much depends. What is amiss or disordered within, in consequence of folly, passion, or guilt, may be rectified by due care under the assistance of Divine grace.
4. Let us frequently look up to Him who made the human heart, and implore His assistance in the regulation and government of it. The employments of devotion themselves form one of the most powerful means of composing and tranquillising the heart. Devotion opens a sanctuary to which they whose hearts have been most deeply wounded can always fly. (Hugh Blair, D.D.)
The secret sorrows and joys of the heart known to God
Each mans heart is to himself a solitude, into which he can retire and be alone, indulging his own thoughts without an associate and without a witness. There is a world within which must lie undiscovered by the acutest observer. And we could not make the discovery to others even if we would. It would not be possible to communicate to another all that is within us. It is one of the delights and benefits of friendship that it helps men, in a measure, to open their minds to one another. But this can only be done in part. Every one has his reserve. This is especially true respecting the sorrows and joys of religion. No Christian can find a spirit so perfectly kindred to his own as to be able to comprehend all the sources of his grief or of his gladness. In many a sorrow, and in many a joy, he must be solitary. He could not make a full revelation of himself if he would; he would not if he could. God hath so ordered it that no man can fully reveal to another the secrets of his soul. This truth is of the utmost importance when set beside the other truth, that God knoweth us altogether. Two practical lessons:
1. If God is thus near to us, nearer than the closest and most intimate friend can be, we ought to feel His nearness, and bear about with us the constant sense of it.
2. If our hearts are in a great measure shut out from our fellow-man, and open only to God, it is in His sympathy that we should seek our happiness. (G. Bellett.)
Cases of bitterness of heart
I. Of unrevealed and neglected sorrows, a large proportion arises from a strong, natural propensity to dejection and melancholy. As wounds which are occasioned by external violence are more conspicuous, but less dangerous, than the hidden disease which preys upon the vital parts. Some whose circumstances are prosperous are always in the glooms, their feeble mind spreads its malignant tincture over every surrounding prospect. Spectators form their opinions from exterior circumstances, hence they cannot give their sympathy where they cannot observe sufficient cause of misery. Were they ever so much disposed to give it this miserable man would have none of their comfort.
II. There is a class of men who might succeed better in procuring the sympathy of the world could they but tell the cause of their sorrow. Disappointments in a long train have fallen upon the mans head, and the manliness of his spirit is subdued, and he surrenders himself a willing subject to peevishness and despair. Ambition defeated may fret and chagrin the aspiring mind. Affection slighted gives a deep and incurable wound to the man of a feeling heart.
III. The man who secretly grieves for the treachery of a friend has even a more serious claim upon our sympathy. Such a man is sure to say, My bitterness shall be known only to my own heart.
IV. Domestic sources of disquetude. These, from motives of delicacy, are secreted from the notice and sympathy of the world.
V. Cases of persons who have changed their station in life, and cannot fit to their new conditions. As in imperfectly assorted marriages. What misery is experienced which must be kept in reserve.
VI. The man who carries grief in his bosom on account of conscious imperfection and inconsistency of character. He has often resolved upon reformation, made strenuous efforts against temptations, but has failed and relapsed again under the bondage of sin. This has occasioned miserable agitation and perplexity of soul. He mourns in secret that he is not such as his own resolutions prescribe, and the world around him believes him to be. To all earnest persons it is a matter of deep concern to find that a great proportion of secret sorrow falls to the share of those who are most useful, and deserve best from society. (T. Somerville, D.D.)
The hearts hidden depths
Though men live in towns and cities, and in social gatherings, each man is a world to himself. He is as distinct, even from him who is in closest material or mental contact with him, as one orb of heaven is from another.
I. The heart has hidden depths of sorrow. There is bitterness in every heart.
1. There is the bitterness of disappointed love.
2. There is the bitterness of social bereavement–Rachels weeping for their lost children, and Davids for their Absaloms.
3. There is the bitterness of moral remorse. All this is hidden where it is the most deep.
The deepest sorrow in the human heart is hidden from others from three causes.
1. The insulating tendency of deep grief. Deep sorrow withdraws from society and seeks some Gethsemane of solitude.
2. The concealing instinct of deep grief. Men parade little sorrows, but conceal great ones. Deep sorrows are mute.
3. The incapacity of one soul to sound the depths of another. There is such a peculiarity in the constitution and circumstances of each soul that one can never fully understand another.
II. The heart has hidden depths of joy. A stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy. Though joy is less self-concealing than sorrow, yet it has depths unknown to any but its possessor and its God. The joy that rushed into Abrahams heart when Isaac descended with him from the altar on Moriah; the joy of the father when he pressed his prodigal son to his bosom; the joy of the widow of Nain when her only son raised himself from the bier, and returned to gladden her lowly home; the joy of the broken-hearted woman when she heard Christ say, Thy sins are all forgiven thee; such joy has depths that no outward eye could penetrate. The joy of the true Christian is indeed a joy unspeakable and full of glory. This subject furnishes an argument–
1. For candour amongst men.
2. For piety towards God.
Though men know us not, God does. (Homilist.)
Bitterness of heart
While the Christian has no promise of exemption from the general sufferings of humanity, he has trials peculiar to the life of faith.
I. The nature of the Christians bitterness of heart. It is hazardous to represent the Christian life as a scene of constant sunshine and unaltered joy. This has occasioned much uneasiness and disappointment. The heart that is right with God has much anxiety, disquiet, and sorrow. These are dependent on disposition and temperament.
II. The sources of such inward sorrow and distress.
1. The secret consciousness of guilt.
2. The general infirmity of our intellectual and moral constitution. For instance, that depression of animal spirits to which some of the most regularly constituted minds are often most subject, and which no intellectual energy is at times able to dissipate or surmount.
3. Fears of shortcoming are sometimes the result of that increased spirituality of mind which marks the progress of the Divine life. Whatever be the attainments of the Christian, he has often hours of heaviness and alarm, and is troubled with distressing apprehensions respecting the safety of his state before God. This feeling must, of course, be greatly modified by the temper and circumstances of the believer, and in different individuals may arise from different causes. (John Johnston.)
The bitterness and joy of the heart
1. There is a bitterness and a joy of the heart which may be called more peculiarly its own, because it arises from the temper of the mind, which gives its own tone to circumstances and things in themselves indifferent. There is a marked contrast between the minds of different individuals. Every day is full of events which receive the character of good or evil from the mind of the individual related to them. Then, since so much depends on the cultivation of the mind and heart, let this be your chief concern.
2. The heart alone is conscious of its own feelings. Happiness and misery have no existence but in the conscious breast, and they are in a great measure confined to it. There are some sensations which the heart never attempts to express. There are some which it is our wish and endeavour to express. But how faint is the impression which we can convey to other minds of what is passing in our own. There is but one Being beside ourselves who knows our heart in the joys and sorrows of life. There is but one Being who can enter into our feelings amid the bitterness and joy of death. There is but one Being who can be all in all to our souls, in the changes and chances of this mortal life, and amid the unchanging glories of eternity: Acquaint thyself with Him; and be at peace. (George Cole.)
A private apartment of the mind
Each mind possesses m its interior mansions a solemn retired apartment peculiarly its own, into which none but himself and the Deity can enter. (John Foster.)
The hearts refusal of the worlds interference in its bitterness and joy
If you would seek for God, said a pious man of old, descend into your own heart.
I. The imperfect estimate which we form of the real state of the world. One half the world knows not how the other half lives, and certainly one half has no idea of what the other half feels. All have their calamities and sorrows, so that no man has any real occasion for envying his brother. Our afflictions may be divided into those which we suffer from the cruelty of others, those which arise from our own guilt, and those with which Providence, in the general course of His dealings, visits all of us in our turn.
II. The sin of those who trifle with the feelings of an afflicted heart. Illustrate from the child who has brought distress on loving parents; the seducer of innocence; the slanderer and tale-bearer.
III. Those sorrows which arise from a sense of our state towards God. We live, it is true, in a world of much infidelity and sin, but there are many who have accepted the everlasting gospel as the power of God unto salvation. It must have opened on them a very awful view of the things of this life; and when conscience, awakening them to think upon their duty, points to that holy book from which we shall be judged, they can scarcely fail of looking on their life with terror and dismay.
IV. The sorrow arising from the ordinary visitations of providence. But our religion carries consolation with its sorrows. This comes from the belief in the Omniscience of God; in the grace of God; in the promise of remission of sins; in the assurance of a general resurrection. (G. Mathew, M.A.)
On the secret bitterness of the heart
Nothing is to be estimated by its effects upon common eyes and common ears.
1. Among the mental dispositions which prevail with the sufferer to smother his secret pangs and bitternesses from public inspection, the first is pride, whether of a pardonable or an improper description. Timidity is not less solicitous than pride to wrap up its griefs from general observation. Prudence and a sense of duty exert a similar influence.
2. When the circumstances of a sufferer are outward and visible, his perception of his calamity may be far more acute than the common observer surmises. And the heart of a man may be wrung with an unusual bitterness in consequence of its unusually delicate sense of religious and moral obligation.
Practical improvements:
1. The survey delivers a lecture on resignation and contentment and disproves the notion that there is actually any large inequality in the Divine distribution of good and evil among mankind.
2. The subject suggests an instructive lesson of mutual sympathy and kindness in all the varieties of outward condition. There never has breathed yet one individual in the full enjoyment of pure, unalloyed happiness.
3. Take care that the common and unavoidable uneasiness shall not be aggravated by that self-dissatisfaction which arises from wilful disobedience.
4. Remember that we are passing on to a fairer and more faultless condition of being, where the souls of the pious and penitent shall have their capacity for enjoyment filled up to the brim. (J. Grant, M.A.)
The believers sorrows and joys
I. The believers sorrows. There are sorrows common to believers and to unbelievers. There are some peculiar to the renewed man. Those are the most alive to sin who are most free from sin. A strong sense of sin is one of the characteristics of the real man of God. Believers are also at times unable to receive the promises. When comfort is offered they cannot avail themselves of it. Sometimes there is great spiritual depression under a sense of the withdrawal of Gods favour. But there is nothing more dangerous than to leave the soul in this state of bitterness of heart.
II. The believers joys. What is it in which he finds joy?
1. From the joyful sound of the everlasting gospel.
2. The joy of pardoning grace applied to the soul.
3. The fulness of Divine grace.
4. Communion with God. (H. M. Villiers, M.A.)
The inward unapproachable life
We know each others appearance, but there for the most part our mutual knowledge ceases. It is possible to live on terms of even close intimacy with a person for many years, and yet to find, by some chance uplifting of a curtain in his life, that he cherished feelings which you never even suspected, suffered pains of which you had seen no trace, or enjoyed pleasures which never came to any outward expression. The bitterness which surges in our brothers heart would probably be unintelligible to us if he revealed it, but he will not reveal it, he cannot. And yet we all hunger for sympathy. No human being needs to be misunderstood, or to suffer under the sense of misunderstanding. Let him turn at once to God. If he cannot tell his bitterness to his fellows, he can tell it to God. No human being need imagine that he is unappreciated; his fellow-men may not want him, but God does. No human being need be without a sharer of his joy. And that is a great consideration, for joy unshared quickly dies, and is from the beginning haunted by a vague sense of a shadow that is falling upon it. In the heart of the Eternal dwells eternal joy. All loveliness, all sweetness, all goodness, all truth, are the objects of His happy contemplation; therefore every really joyful heart has an immediate sympathiser in God, and prayer is quite as much the means by which we share our gladness as the vehicle by which we convey our sorrows to the Divine heart. (R. F. Horton, D.D.)
Fuente: Biblical Illustrator Edited by Joseph S. Exell
Verse 10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness] morrath naphsho, “The bitterness of its soul.” Under spiritual sorrow, the heart feels, the soul feels; all the animal nature feels and suffers. But when the peace of God is spoken to the troubled soul, the joy is indescribable; the whole man partakes of it. And a stranger to these religious feelings, to the travail of the soul, and to the witness of the Spirit, does not intermeddle with them; he does not understand them: indeed they may be even foolishness to him, because they are spiritually discerned.
Fuente: Adam Clarke’s Commentary and Critical Notes on the Bible
The sense of the verse is this, The inward griefs and joys of mens hearts, though sometimes they may be guessed at by outward signs, yet are not certainly known to any but a mans self. Compare 1Co 2:11. The scope of the parable may be to keep men from murmuring under their own troubles, or envying other mens happiness.
A stranger, any other person without or besides a mans self, doth not intermeddle with his joy; doth not partake of it, nor understand it.
Fuente: English Annotations on the Holy Bible by Matthew Poole
10. Each one best knows his ownsorrows or joys.
Fuente: Jamieson, Fausset and Brown’s Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible
The heart knoweth his own bitterness,…. Or “the bitterness of his soul” l, the distress of his conscience, the anguish of his mind; the heart of man only knows the whole of it; something of it may be known to others by his looks, his words, and gestures, but not all of it; see 1Co 2:10; bitterness of soul often arises from outward troubles, pains, and diseases of body, losses, crosses, and disappointments, 1Sa 1:10. Sometimes it is upon spiritual accounts; but this is not the case of every heart; men may be in the gall of bitterness, and have no bitterness of soul on account of it; the sensualist and voluptuous worldling feels nothing of it, nor the hardened and hardhearted sinner; only such who are awakened and convinced by the Spirit of God; to these, as sin is a bitter thing in itself, it is so to their taste; it makes hitter work for repentance in them; it brings trembling and astonishment on them; fills them with shame and confusion of face, causes self-loathing and abhorrence, and severe reflections upon themselves; seeing sin in its own colours, they are cut to the heart and killed with it; they are pressed down with the guilt of sin, and the load of it; and, having no views of pardon, are in that distress and bitterness of soul which no tongue can express nor heart conceive but what has felt the same;
and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy; or “mingle himself with it” m; he does not share in it or partake of it; this is more especially true of spiritual joy, which, as it is unspeakable to the man that possesses it, it passes the understanding of a natural man; he can form no true idea of it: spiritual joy is what a sensible sinner partakes of upon the Gospel, the joyful sound of salvation, reaching his ears and his heart, at the revelation of Christ in him and to him, as a Saviour; when an application of pardoning grace is made to his soul, and he has a view of the complete righteousness of Christ, and his interest in it, and can see all his sins expiated and stoned for by his sacrifice; when he is favoured with a sight of the fulness of grace in Christ, and of the spiritual and eternal salvation he has wrought out for him; and likewise when he is indulged with a visit from him, and enjoys communion with him; and when he has a glimpse of eternal glory, and a well grounded hope of right unto it, and meetness for it: now a stranger, one that is a stranger to God and godliness, to Christ and the way of salvation by him, to the Spirit and his work of grace upon the heart, to the Gospel and the doctrines of it, to his own heart and the plague of it, to the saints and communion with them; knows nothing at all of the above joy, nor can he interrupt it, nor take it away.
l “amaritudine animae suae”, V. L. Pagninus, Montanus, Mercerus, Cocceius, Gejerus, Michaelis. m “non immiscet se”, Michaelis, so Tigurine version; “non miscebit sese”, Baynus; “non intermiscet se”, Junius & Tremellius, Piscator.
Fuente: John Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible
Four proverbs of joy and sorrow in the present and the future:
10 The heart knoweth the trouble of its soul,
And no stranger can intermeddle with its joy.
The accentuation seems to point out as an adjective (Lwenstein: a feeling heart), after 1Ki 3:9, or genit. (of a feeling heart); but Cod. 1294 and the Jemen Cod., and others, as well as the editions of Jablonsky and Michaelis, have with Rebia, so that this is by itself to be taken as the subject (cf. the accentuation Pro 15:5 and under at 16a). has the with Dagesh, and consequently the short Kametz ( Michlol 63b), like Pro 3:8, cf. , Jdg 6:28, and on the contrary , Eze 16:4; it is the fem. of mor = morr , from , adstringere, amarum esse . Regarding , in contradistinction to , vid., Psychol. p. 251. “All that is meant by the Hellenic and Hellenistic , , , , is comprehended in , and all by which the and are affected comes in into the light of consciousness.”
The first half of the proverb is clear: the heart, and only it, i.e., the man in the centre of his individuality, knows what brings bitterness to his soul, i.e., what troubles him in the sphere of his natural life and of the nearest life-circle surrounding him. It thus treats of life experiences which are of too complex a nature to be capable of being fully represented to others, and, as we are wont to say, of so delicate a nature that we shrink from uncovering them and making them known to others, and which on this account must be kept shut up in our own hearts, because no man is so near to us, or has so fully gained our confidence, that we have the desire and the courage to pour out our hearts to him from their very depths. Yet the saying, “Every one knows where the shoe pinches him” (1Ki 8:38), stands nearer to this proverb; here this expression receives a psychological, yet a sharper and a deeper expression, for the knowledge of that which grieves the soul is attributed to the heart, in which, as the innermost of the soul-corporeal life, it reflects itself and becomes the matter-of-fact of the reflex consciousness in which it must shut itself up, but also for the most part without external expression. If we now interpret as prohibitive, then this would stand (with this exception, that in this case instead of is to be expected) in opposition, certainly not intended, to the exhortation, Rom 12:15, “Rejoice with them that do rejoice,” and to the saying, “Distributed joy is doubled joy, distributed sorrow is half sorrow;” and an admonition to leave man alone with his joy, instead of urging him to distribute it, does not run parallel with 10a. Therefore we interpret the fut. as potentialis . As there is a soul-sorrow of the man whose experience is merely a matter of the heart, so there is also a soul-joy with which no other ( vid., regarding , p. 135, and cf. here particularly Job 19:27) intermeddleth ( like Psa 106:35), in which no other can intermeddle, because his experience, as e.g., of blessed spiritual affection or of benevolent feeling, is purely of a personal nature, and admits of no participation (cf. on , Mat 13:44), and thus of no communication to others. Elster well observes: “By this thought, that the innermost feelings of a man are never fully imparted to another man, never perfectly cover themselves with the feelings of another, yea, cannot at all be fully understood by another, the worth and the significance of each separate human personality is made conspicuous, not one of which is the example of a species, but each has its own peculiarity, which no one of countless individuals possesses. At the same time the proverb has the significance, that it shows the impossibility of a perfect fellowship among men, because one never wholly understands another. Thereby it is indicated that no human fellowship can give true salvation, but only the fellowship with God, whose love and wisdom are capable of shining through the most secret sanctuary of human personality.” Thus also Dchsel (but he interprets 10b admonitorily): “Each man is a little world in himself, which God only fully sees through and understands. His sorrow appertaining to his innermost life, and his joy, another is never able fully to transfer to himself. Yea, the most sorrowful of all experiences, the most inward of all joys, we possess altogether alone, without any to participate with us.”
Fuente: Keil & Delitzsch Commentary on the Old Testament
10 The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
This agrees with 1 Cor. ii. 11, What man knows the things of a man, and the changes of his temper, save the spirit of a man? 1. Every man feels most from his own burden, especially that which is a burden upon the spirits, for that is commonly concealed and the sufferer keeps it to himself. We must not censure the griefs of others, for we know not what they feel; their stroke perhaps is heavier than their groaning. 2. Many enjoy a secret pleasure, especially in divine consolations, which others are not aware of, much less are sharers in; and, as the sorrows of a penitent, so the joys of a believer are such as a stranger does not intermeddle with and therefore is no competent judge of.
Fuente: Matthew Henry’s Whole Bible Commentary
Unsharable Experiences
Verse 10 emphasizes the solitary nature of the human spirit. There is an aspect of sorrow and joy that cannot be shared by other human beings, be they ever so considerate. It is a comfort, however, to know that the LORD above understand and is willing to help in every situation experienced by His own, Dan 3:23-27; Psalms 23; Act 27:20-25; Mat 6:8; Mat 6:32-33.
Fuente: Garner-Howes Baptist Commentary
CRITICAL NOTES.
Pro. 14:10. Zckler reads the latter clause, Let no stranger, etc. Miller renders the whole verse, A knowing heart is a bitterness to itself; but with its joy it does not hold intercourse as an enemy.
Pro. 14:11. Tabernacle, tent.
MAIN HOMILETICS OF Pro. 14:10
SECRETS OF THE HEART
I. Opposite dwellers in the same spirit. Bitterness and joy. The world without us is a type of the world within us. In the world of matter the bitter cold, the desolation of winter, alternates with the brightness and joyous fruitfulness of summer. On the same globe we have at the same time the vineclad regions of southern latitudes, and the dreary shores of arctic regions. Bitterness in the human spirit is a fact of human consciousness, and so is joy. There are few hearts that have not been at different times possessed by both. There are few in which there does not dwell at the same time a root of gladness and a root of sadness.
II. A possession which its possessor may keep a profound secret. It is within the power of a human soul to keep his sorrow or his joy to himself if he so pleases, and under certain conditions this is a desirable thing to do. A man or woman often finds himself or herself surrounded by those who are entire strangers to the circumstances, or the persons, or the experiences which have given birth to the sorrow or the joy. To speak of it to such would be worse than useless. It is a comfort in such circumstances to be able to lock the secret within ones own breast. There is a consolation in sorrow, and a sense of increase of joy in not being compelled to lay open our feelings to the inspection of the unsympathetic. There are also sorrows of such a nature as to be entirely beyond the power of the tenderest human love to alleviate. To conceal such from all human ken is a kindness to those who love us. We should inflict sorrow upon them without lightening our own burden; and if we are unselfish, we are glad that it is possible in such a case to keep our bitterness within our own breast.
III. There is One who possesses the secret even more truly than the human possessor, and who should always be invited to intermeddle with our sorrow or our joy.
1. We should invite God to intermeddle, because we can do so in the strictest secresy of the soul. It may be impossible sometimes to put into words our joy or our sorrow, and therefore no human being, even the nearest and dearest, can always intermeddle with our deep emotions. But the thought is speech to God. He knoweth what is the mind of the spirit.
2. Because Gods intermeddling will bring softening to our bitterness and refinement to our joy. He knew the sorrows of Israel in their bitter bondage (Exo. 3:7). He sent His Son to bind up the broken-hearted (Isa. 61:1). That Son Himself has known a bitterness that is unknowable by any creature. And as He can lighten sorrow so He can refine and increase joy.
OUTLINES AND SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS
Within the range of human experience there is, perhaps, no expression of the ultimate solitude of each mans soul at all times, and not merely (as in Pascals Je mourrai seul) at the hour of death, so striking in its truth and depth as this. Something there is in every sorrow, and in every joy, which no one else can share. Beyond that range it is well to remember that there is a Divine sympathy, uniting perfect knowledge and perfect love.Plumptre.
The first half of this proverb treats of life experiences which are of too complex a nature to be capable of being fully represented to others, and, as we are wont to say, of so delicate a nature that we shrink from uncovering them and making them known to others, and which, on this account, must be kept shut up in our own hearts, because no man is so near to us, or has so fully gained our confidence, that we have the desire and the courage to pour out our hearts to him from the very depths. If we were to interpret the second clause as prohibitive (see Critical Notes), then this would stand in opposition, certainly not intended, to the exhortation (Rom. 12:15), Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and to the saying, Distributed joy is doubled joy, distributed sorrow is half sorrow; and an admonition to leave man alone with his joy, instead of urging him to distribute it, does not run parallel with the first clause. Therefore we interpret the future as potentialis.Delitzsch.
Not to let a man be private in his house is a great injury, but not to let a man be private in his heart is a wrong inexcusable. And yet this is the strange presumption of some. They know the heart of another; they know what troubles it and what pains it. Perhaps by some discoveries thou mayest have some conjectures; but let not a small conjecture make thee a great offender. Wrong not another with unjust surmising. Every key a man meets with is not the right key to this lock; every likelihood thou apprehendest is not a sure sign to make thee know the heart of another.Jermin.
A knowing heart is a bitterness to itself; but with its joy it does not hold intercourse as an enemy. We venture upon this translation. We find no spiritual sense in the one heretofore given. A heart spiritually enlightened is a bitterness to itself on the principle which Christ meant when He said, He came not to send peace, but a sword (Mat. 10:34); but with its joy, weak as it may be, and small and easily clouded, it does not, as the impenitent do, hold intercourse as with an enemy. His joy is like his bitterness, a friend; and all will work in opposite direction to the joy of the wicked.Miller.
Eli could not enter into the bitterness of soul of Hannah (1Sa. 1:10; 1Sa. 1:13; 1Sa. 1:16): nor Gehazi into that of the Shunamite woman (2Ki. 4:27). Michal, though the wife of David, was a stranger to his joy at the bringing up of the ark to Zion (1Sa. 18:13; 1Sa. 18:20, with 2Sa. 6:12-16).Fausset.
The two extreme experiences of a human heart, which comprehend all others between them, are bitterness and joy. The solitude of a human being in either extremity is a solemnising thought. Whether you are glad or grieved, you must be alone. The bitterness and the joyfulness are both your own. It is only in a modified sense, and in a limited measure, that you can share them with another, so as to have less of them yourself. Sympathy between two human beings is, after all, little more than a figure of speech. A physical burden can be divided equally between two. If you, unburdened, overtake a weary pilgrim on the way, toiling beneath a load of a hundred pounds weight, you may volunteer to bear fifty of them for the remaining part of the journey, and so lighten his load by half. But a light heart, however willing it may be, cannot so relieve a heavy one. The cares that press upon the spirit are as real as the load that lies on the back, and as burdensome; but they are not so tangible and divisible. There are, indeed, some very intimate unions in human society, as organised by God. The closest of them all, the two no longer twain, but one flesh, is a union of unspeakable value for such sympathy as is compatible with distinct personality at all. The wife of your bosom can, indeed, intermeddle with your joys and sorrows, as no stranger can do, and yet there are depths of both in your breast which even she has no line to fathom. When you step into the waters of lifes last sorrow, even she must stand back and remain behind. Each must go forward alone. The Indian suttee seems natures struggle against that fixed necessity of mans condition. But it is a vain oblation. Although the wife burn on the husbands funeral pile, the frantic deed does not lighten the solitude of the dark valley. One human being cannot be merged in another. Man must accept the separate personality that belongs to his nature.Arnot.
It is true, observes a philosophic essayist, that we have all much in common; but what we have most in common is this, that we are all isolated. Man is more than a combination of passions common to his kind. Beyond them and behind them, an inner life, whose current we think we know within us, flows on in solitary stillness. Friendship itself is declared to have nothing in common with this dark sensibility, so repellent and so forbidding, much less may a stranger penetrate to those untrodden shores. We may apply Wordsworths lines,
To friendship let him turn
For succour; but perhaps he sits alone
On stormy waters, tossed in a little boat
That holds but him, and can contain no more.
Jacox.
By this thought the worth and the significance of each separate human personality is made conspicuous, not one of which is the example of a species, but each has its own peculiarity, which no one of countless individuals possesses.Elster.
Who but a parent can fully know the bitterness of his grief who mourneth for an only sonof him who is in bitterness for his first-born. Who but a parent can sympathise with the royal mourners anguish over a son that had died in rebellion against his father and his God! Who but a widow can realise the exquisite bitterness of a widows agony when bereft of the loved partner of her joys and sorrows! Who but a pastor can know, in all its intensity, the bitterness of soul experienced in seeing those on whom he counted as genuine fruits of his ministry, and on whom he looked with delighted interest, as his anticipated joy and crown in the day of the Lord, falling awaygoing back and walking no more with Jesus.Wardlaw.
The principal thought of Pro. 14:11 has been treated before. See on chapter Pro. 2:21-22, etc.
OUTLINES AND SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS
The wicked build houses on the earth; the earth is their home, where they desire to be, and they imagine to settle themselves in it. The upright do set up tabernacles only, seeking another country, and as knowing the uncertainty upon which this world standeth. For though the habitation of the wicked be a house, and rooted in the earth, yet it shall not only be shaken, but overthrown, and though the abiding of the upright be but a tabernacle pinned to the earth, yet shall it stand so safely that it shall flourish like a rooted tree. Wherefore, when in the Revelation we read Woe to the inhabitants of the earth (chap. Pro. 8:13), St. Jerome understands it of the wicked only. For a godly man is not an inhabiter of the earth, but a stranger and a sojourner. And his tabernacle doth so flourish, that it reacheth to heaven, for he hath his dwelling in heaven to whom the whole world is an inn.Jermin.
The house of the wicked may be a most prosperous one, and may seem to be full of peace; but it is doomed. It must become desolate, literally astonished; which is the Eastern way of describing grand downfalls. But the tent of the upright (another intensive clause) his slenderest possessions; like a sprout; like some poor tender plant, shall bloom forth. Such is the meaning of flourish.Miller.
Fuente: The Preacher’s Complete Homiletical Commentary Edited by Joseph S. Exell
(10) The heart knoweth his own bitterness . . .None Can perfectly sympathise with the sorrows or joys of others, except the ideal Son of Man, who came to bear our griefs and carry our sorrows (comp. Heb. 4:15), yet could join in the marriage feast at Cana.
Fuente: Ellicott’s Commentary for English Readers (Old and New Testaments)
10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness Hebrew, the heart knows the bitterness of his soul; that is, the bitterness of itself, or its own bitterness. Nephesh is often used in default of a reflexive pronoun. Comp. Pro 12:23. When our version was made the neuter singular pronoun its had not come into use. We now say its instead of his. The sentiment of the proverb is, that every one knows his own experiences, whether of sorrow or of joy, better than it is possible for another to know them.
Intermeddle Intermix or become familiar with, understand thoroughly. Comp. 1Co 2:11 ; 1Co 5:13. The proverb teaches the perfect individuality of each soul. Something there is in every sorrow, in every joy, that no one else can share. But there is a divine sympathizer, uniting perfect knowledge with perfect love. Speaker’s Commentary.
v. 10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness, Pro 14:10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness “Nobody can know what another suffers, so well as the sufferer himself; and he alone is privy to the greatness of that joy which springs from the happy conclusion of his sufferings.” Houbigant renders the verse, He who divulges the trouble of his soul, shall not have another to partake of his joy: i.e. “He who cannot keep to himself his own afflictions, but is continually teizing others with the relation of them, will so weary every one out, as to render them perfectly indifferent to his good or ill fortune.”
DISCOURSE: 783 Pro 14:10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
THE inward experience of men, any further than it is discovered by acts or other outward signs, must of necessity be known to themselves alone. St. Paul puts the question to us, Who knoweth the things of a man, save the spirit of man which is in him [Note: 1Co 2:11.]? Whether a man be filled with sorrow or joy, he alone can be sensible of the measure and extent of his own feelings.
The assertions in my text will be found true,
I.
In reference to the concerns of this world
[Great are the troubles of many, as arising from their own unhappy tempers from their connexions in life or from circumstances of embarrassment in their affairs And who but themselves can fully appreciate their sorrows? On the other hand, the comforts of many are considerable, as flowing from the exercise of benevolence and love from the endearments of domestic life and from that success in their affairs which enables them to supply with ease the wants of themselves and families And of the satisfaction which they feel, a stranger would form a very inadequate conception ]
II.
In reference to the concerns of the soul
[In matters relating to the soul, the feelings are still more acute. None but the person feeling it can tell the bitterness which is occasioned by a sense of sin, with all its aggravations by the prospect of death and judgment, whilst the soul is unprepared to meet its God and by temptations to despondency, and perhaps to suicide itself Jobs friends could not at all appreciate his sorrows, as depicted by himself [Note: Job 6:2-4] Nor can any, but the man whose heart is thus broken, conceive fully what a broken and contrite spirit is
On the other hand, there are in the heart of a true Christian joys, with which a stranger intermeddleth not. The peace that is experienced by him, when God speaks peace to his soul, passeth all understanding [Note: Php 4:7.] And the joys with which he is transported, in the views of his Redeemers glory, in the experience of Gods love shed abroad in his heart, and in the earnest and foretaste of his eternal inheritance, are unspeakable and glorified [Note: 1Pe 1:8. See also Rom 8:15-16 and Eph 1:13-14; Eph 3:18-19.] These joys are, the white stone, with a new name written on it, which no man can read, saving he who has received it [Note: Rev 2:17.] Michal could not understand the exercises of Davids mind [Note: 2Sa 6:16; 2Sa 6:20-22.] Nor can any one fully estimate the blessedness of a soul, when thus admitted to close communion with its God ]
Learn from hence
[Contentment(the very persons whom you envy, are perhaps even envying you ) charity(we can see the outward act only, and can little tell what passes in the hearts of men, whether in a way of humiliation or desire ) and earnestness in the ways of God;that you may attain the deepest measures of contrition, with the sublimest experience of joy. The lower we lay our foundation, the higher we may hope our superstructure shall be raised ]
The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy. The house of the wicked shall be overthrown: but the tabernacle of the upright shall flourish. There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. Even in laughter the heart is sorrowful; and the end of that mirth is heaviness. The backslider in heart shall be filled with his own ways: and a good man shall be satisfied from himself.
God hath said this, and the soul knows the truth of it experimentally. See that scripture, Jer 2:19
Pro 14:10 The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.
Ver. 10. The heart knoweth his own bitterness ] None can conceive the terrors and torments of a heart that lies under the sense of sin and fear of wrath. A little water in a leaden vessel is heavy. Some can bear in their grief better than others; but all that are under this affliction have their back burden. Job’s “stroke was heavier than his groaning,” Job 23:2 and yet his complaint was bitter too. Some holy men, as Mr Leaver, have desired to see their sin in the most ugly colours, and God hath heard them. But yet his hand was so heavy upon them that they went always mourning to their graves, and thought it fitter to leave it to God’s wisdom to mingle the portion of sorrow than to be their own choosers. a
And the stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy. a Dr Sibbes.
b , 2Co 7:4 .
c Chrysos.
d Acts and Mon ., fol. 1668.
e Ibid ., 1533.
his own bitterness = the bitterness of his soul (Hebrew. nephesh. App-13). Illustrations: Hannah (1Sa 1:8-13); Joab (2Sa 19:5-7); the Shunammite (2Ki 4:27); Haman (Est 5:13); Job (Job 3); Herod (Mar 6:16).
a stranger = an apostate. Hebrew. zur. See note on Pro 2:16; Pro 5:3.
Pro 14:10
Pro 14:10
“The heart knoweth its own bitterness; And a stranger doth not intermeddle with its joy.”
There is here revealed a strange and terrible secret of human life. “The most sorrowful of all our experiences, and the most inward of all our joys, we must possess altogether alone. There is no such thing as a perfect fellowship among mortals. No human fellowship can give salvation, but only the fellowship with God, whose love and wisdom are capable of shining into that most secret sanctuary of human personality. Every human being is a little world to self alone, a world which only God sees and understands. “Who among men knoweth the things of a man, save the spirit of the man which is within him”? (1Co 2:11).
Pro 14:10. There is a portion of each persons inner-self that no one else can fully enter into. After others have sought to assuage our grief with their words lovingly administered, there is still a portion that they have not touched not known. On the other hand after we have sought to share our joys with others, we have probably enlisted their polite ears more than we have their hearts feelings. We cannot fully communicate our joys, nor can they fully enter into our joys.
heart: Pro 15:13, Pro 18:14, 1Sa 1:10, 2Ki 4:27, Job 6:2-4, Job 7:11, Job 9:18, Job 10:1, Eze 3:14, Mar 14:33, Mar 14:34, Joh 12:27
his: etc. Heb. the bitterness of his soul, Gen 42:21
and: Psa 25:14, Joh 14:18, Joh 14:23, Phi 4:7, 1Pe 1:8, Rev 2:17
Reciprocal: 1Ki 8:38 – the plague 2Ch 6:29 – know Job 21:25 – in the bitterness Pro 3:32 – his Pro 12:25 – Heaviness Pro 14:14 – a good Joh 4:32 – that Joh 14:17 – whom 1Co 2:11 – what
Pro 14:10. The heart knoweth its own bitterness The inward griefs and joys of mens hearts, though sometimes they may be partly manifested by outward signs, yet are not certainly and fully known to any but the persons themselves who are the subjects of them; or, as Bishop Patrick paraphrases the verse, Nobody can know what another suffers so well as the sufferer himself; and he alone is privy to the greatness of that joy which springs from the happy conclusion of his sufferings. The scope of the proverb may be, to keep men from murmuring under their own troubles, or envying other mens happiness.
14:10 The heart knoweth its own {g} bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with its joy.
(g) As a man’s conscience is witness to his own grief, so another cannot feel the joy and comfort which a man feels in himself.
Fuente: Whedon’s Commentary on the Old and New Testaments
Fuente: The Popular Commentary on the Bible by Kretzmann
Fuente: Commentary on the Holy Bible by Thomas Coke
MANS EXPERIENCE KNOWN TO HIMSELF ALONE
Fuente: Charles Simeon’s Horae Homileticae (Old and New Testaments)
Fuente: Hawker’s Poor Man’s Commentary (Old and New Testaments)
Fuente: John Trapp’s Complete Commentary (Old and New Testaments)
Fuente: Companion Bible Notes, Appendices and Graphics
Fuente: Old and New Testaments Restoration Commentary
Fuente: The Treasury of Scripture Knowledge
Fuente: Joseph Bensons Commentary on the Old and New Testaments
Fuente: Geneva Bible Notes